I first became aware of the disconnect between the life I was living and the life I dreamed of, when I read Glennon Doyle Melton’s first book, Carry on Warrior, and heard her philosophy of doing the next right thing. In a way this is very similar to flow. I was sitting in a cubicle pregnant with my third child. I had two kids in daycare and we were trying to figure out how to afford daycare for the new baby. I had a really amazing job that I loved. I worked with amazing people. But every morning as I dropped my kids off at daycare, I felt this pull at my heartstrings to be with them.
We sat down one day to really assess what would make us happy. I admitted I wanted to be home with the kids, especially with the third on the way. He admitted he wanted to move to the country, away from the hustle of the city. This was the first step on our path to following our flow instead of what others told us we needed to do. We bought a house for $100k less than our last house so we could afford it on one income and started paying off debt. I am now able to stay home with my three lovely kids and couldn’t be happier.
The first step of finding your flow is about writing down your values and putting together a plan to spend more time living in them. It is about asking yourself what you’re willing to give up to live your values every day. I now get to cuddle my kids every morning when they wake up, I’ve been there for every one of my daughter’s firsts – first step, first word, first solid food. I’m grateful for every day I have with them. But I’m also aware of what I gave up to be with them, the more expensive, bigger house in the bigger city mainly. But it is worth it! I often tell my husband I’m the luckiest mom in the world.
So, this is how we got started on our path to finding our flow. This is when we started putting our trust in life that it would bring us what we needed.